Strangers - Silk Thread Growing Through the Glass Tube Bisecting the Abdomen of a Cecropia Moth Hatched in Captivity - DNA - Nothing Here.

If I could become a stranger to this place once again I would hide between the years and live there but in the present day the entropy remains every time I find a home I just want to run away [...] The way the sun hits the corners of my room it reminds me of a dream I had of a world where i was still afraid but where I also belonged deep in the sunlit cracks in the pavement sometimes, late at night I look up the names of the things that were done to me and I try to imagine them slithering through my blood coiled around my DNA And on the bus to somewhere else I felt like a wasted stray run away forget it all again and disappear aching longing for a lifetime from someone else's mind can I be someone else and I leave this all behind? The cold Vancouver rain I don't know who to blame for the hole that i feel inside my brain is there a way to feel like I can be something more than this a rusted-out carcass of the dreams that I still remember take me back I want to know what safety feels like I was supposed to be a person I was supposed to be a fucking person they asked me what I wanted to be but I didn't know I couldn't know they made me forget I still don't know sometimes I feel like a wasp egg parasitizing a beautiful insect hatching into a fungus, a rare bird, a silk thread that reaches all the way up into the sky There's nothing here for me and I just keep staring at the sky I hate everything I am oh god please let me die I remember feeling something like hope before the end I want to start again... Why does everyone feel so far away? I don't understand what I am anymore. And in the light I can see myself in a different life ******* ** *** **** It was so long ago it was so long ago... it was so long ago